[ WHAT A DIZZY DANCE ]

Dragons, snow? This far south? And it's coming down, too. What the fuck?

I expected just a few flurries when it started, but I can't see more than a few feet in front of my face right now. This is absolutely fucking insane.

Ugh, I'm going to have to stop for the night, but I can't imagine where. It's a dead stretch of road. Though even if there were an inn right off to my right, I'm not sure I'd see it. Dragons.

Freak storm.

In any case, I need to stop moving. Rafar is going to stumble and sprain if I keep it up, and then what am I going to do? Looks as if there's a stand of trees near here ...

[Filter: Private]

Heh.

I'm starting to wonder if all of this is actually getting to her. The more I think about it ... she's actually seemed human, lately. And now, this -- jealous? Dragons, I don't even like Eriena.

It's all ... well, seriously, it's a little hard to process.

But it's not bad. It's the opposite, really. Jealousy means caring. It's a hell of a lot better than twenty years of fucking apathy, that's for sure. I wonder if maybe, she's finally starting to melt a bit.

That could almost make all of this -- being in Diarnay, dealing with the family, all of this bullshit -- completely worth it.

I guess I can hope that the rest of this little experiment goes so well ...

[Filter: Eriena]

Well, hi, there.

Sweet hell.

No one in any bar wants to serve more than one glass of alcohol on the Night of the Dead in this city. And they give you this look when you ask, too, this how dare you show such disrespect to the dead.

What I want to know is how it's disrespectful at all. Maybe I lost someone important and I'm drowning my sorrows. Maybe this was a tradition we shared together. They don't know that I'm just stifled by the "no one breathe wrong" atmosphere. And thirsty.

That's one thing I miss about Korin, I swear. They sure know how to mourn right, there.

[Filter: Private]

Yeah, I'm -- sulking. Yeah, I'm probably not the best company right now. Obviously, I know that. How could I not know that?

I just ...

This is it, all laid out. Welcome to the rest of your life, Matthias. In this marriage that's barely working, a week away from fucking Diarnay, where I can sit right under my father's thumb, keeping books and being a responsible adult. That's the rest of my life.

When I always said that I could never picture myself in ten years, I never thought it was just beacuse the only existance I could hope for would be so ...

Yeah, whine harder, you giant fucking baby.

[Filter: Hazel]

I'm going to go down to the common room. Don't bother waiting up.

[Filter: Private]

So that's that.

Father says jump and I say how high! After all of this. After years away at the Academy, after thinking I was married and adult and finally free, I go right back to Diarnay and I'm more under his apathetic dragonsdamned thumb than ever before.

That's life, huh?

That's my life.

I shouldn't even be surprised. I shouldn't ...

I shouldn't ever had dared to think that I was free.

Start packing your bags, Matthias, you're about to become a landowner.

[Filter: Hazel]

Yeah, alright. Let's do it. If you're sure about it, too, I'll write to my father and get the money tomorrow.

I like it. Nice place. Already got all these ideas of what we can do with it.

[Filter: Eriena]

Well, hey there, you.

[Filter: Private]

Well.

This is it.

... yeah.

[Filter: Public]

So hey, magic journals, I went and got married. Good times.

[filter: p rivate]

fuc kin

ever y thin g

[Fil ter: Er ie na]

well hey

how
s

li fe?

[Filter: Private]

Seraphine.

... really.

She's the real deal, after all? Really?

I've seen her writing here for years and it's been so easy to dismiss her. It seemed way too dragonsdamned convenient, didn't it? Her just showing up here? No memory?

But Ian believed it from the second I told him -- as a fucking joke. Her father has declared her the genuine article before the entire country. There's celebrations breaking out from Aeda to Lireth, the Pilgram's Pass to Erisport.

Still doesn't seem real.

It's easier, for everyone else. Everyone loved her, who couldn't love her? People loved Seraphine more than Ian! But she was always a degree away from them, wasn't she? A happy shiney flowery pixie. For whatever reason, I was --

Well, I guess I was sor of friends with them, wasn't I?

All those years, thinking Hazel was my only friend. Now I see that maybe she's never thought of me as -- as anything, and the people I thought were just humouring me ...

I'd write to her, but what's the point? She wouldn't remember me and I'm not sure what I'd even have to say. Welcome back! You're alive!

[Filter: Ian]

Crazy shit, huh?

But I guess this is old news, to you, since you always believed in her.